I Can't Complain!

Wow. Saying that this internship would keep me busy was an understatement. This internship is my LIFE! I get to school around 7:30 every morning, then stay until 6 every night when the janitor makes me go home. Then I lug a bunch of papers and notebooks and things to grade home with me and do that most of the night. And when I finally do get the chance to be social... What do I talk about? School. This happened, and this student said this, and oh my goodness I have to get this done... Sheesh. It's consumed me. Don't get me wrong, I really love this job. But it is so hard! I really miss having a life outside of school.

I have decided that nothing is harder than teaching while sick. This last week has been so taxing. I have been trying to get over a cold for about a week and a half now. Last Saturday was the worst of it. I got to sleep in until 9 (I love how that is sleeping in for me now), woke up coughing so hard I couldn't breathe, begged Samantha to take me to the store for cough drops and a Jamba Juice, then watched a bit of TV before deciding that after being up for a whopping 3 hours I needed a nap. I was in and out of bed all day (mostly in), before begging my dad to make me soup, and finally calling my facilitator around 6:30 to freak out about how I hadn't been able to get any lesson planning done yet. I sort of broke down on the phone (so embarrassing), at which she basically told me to go to bed and try again the next day. Normally my whole weeks' worth of lesson plans would be due Monday morning by 8am, but she took pity on my and said to just get Monday done and we could take it a day at a time. I was grateful, but not being ahead of the game stresses me out. Also, I knew that I was being observed for my JPAS (Jordan District teacher observation system where the principal randomly comes in twice in a week-ish time frame to observe your teaching)... and I had an inkling that it was going to be on Monday. So Monday I got out of bed, forced myself to school, and put on a brave, although still coughing, face. I survived my observation that day, switching classrooms the next (again- yay for the track change being in the middle of the week instead of on Fridays like usual...), and another observation Thursday afternoon. This week was the hardest week of my life, I swear it. But I made it through, and I'm pretty positive that I can handle whatever else this internship will throw at me.

I promise more details later. Every day is a new and exciting experience; for better or for worse. I am not short on stories, but I am definitely short on time to write them all down.

With all the ups and downs I feel like this song should be my life motto right about now. It just rings so true to this whole internship thing! Enjoy. :)

"I know some days I'm gonna stumble, and I know the cookie's gonna crumble, and I know life is gonna suck some days... But I can't complain!"

In conclusion: As exhausting and difficult as this experience has been so far, every single time one of my students says something nice about me or gives me a hug, I just melt. It reminds me why I wanted to do this in the first place, and shows me that even when I feel like giving up I am making a difference!!

So, with that in mind: Life is beautiful!... Mostly.
♥, Meagan

A Vision of Summer (Friends, Family, Parks, Swimming, and Picnics!)

Lately I have realized that I believe you have to make it through the mundane in order to get to the amazing - the things you really love. I feel like that's what this summer has been about for me. I am learning to work first and play later, which should be my mantra, but all too often is not. My summer started out like this:

Lamination has become the bane of my existence pretty much.

Because of the seemingly endless amounts of cutting, creativity, and writing of lesson plans that has been required of me this summer I have definitely had a woe-is-me, I'm so busy I don't even know what to do with myself attitude about summer so far. But don't worry, because I have recently stepped back and reevaluated things. I have actually had way more fun than I realized along the way. So without further adieu, here are a few of my summer shenanigans!! 

In the process of all this lovely craziness I have decided that SUMMER IS FOR....

...Saran Wrap! Ok, maybe not just Saran Wrap. I think it was the amazing people that I had the time to bond with (see what I did there?) while wrapped in it. I have really missed the social aspect of Provo and BYU, and I had the chance a few weeks ago to spend a few nights in Provo. In another post I mentioned being Saran wrapped to a bunch of other people, and true to form I took forever to get pictures up. But behold: It was fantastic fun. :)

We are having so much
fun! (Lisa is hidden in the back
where you can't see her.)

Robbie is a beast! And I was
falling over (as much as
possible while attached
to 4 other people.)

The aftermath. :)

...Parks! Summer is a time of graduation and celebration. But also lots and lots of playing. Preferably on playgrounds. Who says I have to be a grown up in order to have a big kid job? 

Don't let my happy face fool you. This was a VERY painful experience.
But a cute picture!

COUSINS!! As close as this pretty girl lives,
I do not see her nearly enough!

...Swimming! Going swimming is always the highlight of my summer. Sadly, I have only had the chance to go once this year. But I plan to make time for much more of that. :)

A new swimsuit definitely warranted a cheesy selfie.

...Pretty flowers! I love watching all the roses bloom on my mom's rosebushes. They brighten my day every time I walk through the yard. :)

They went from this....

.....to this in a matter of days! Amazing!

...Picnics!! Picnics are my favorite! I love taking the time to go enjoy the sunshine and eat in the grass with people I love.

We went on a Sunday picnic!
And waded in the creek. :)

I super love this picture. :) 

Summer is also for... Sandals! And soda! And pretty green grass. :) And baseball games! I don't usually love baseball, but we go every year for a company party for my dad. This year I enjoyed it more than usual. I think it's probably because I've been so stressed with getting ready for my internship. I've had some big due dates in the last week or so and since I got it all done I FINALLY had time to kick back and relax a bit. I think I forgot what that was like. :)

I think the scariest part of my summer internship planning is over (at least for now... fingers crossed) but we all know it only gets worse from here. So in the mean time I am going to make time for more fun things! So far all I have is Lagoon on my agenda. We are going next week for a daddy/daughters day! But other than that? I am very open to suggestions. Bring on summer. :)

Wait a minute! My post wouldn't be complete without a song now, would it? Here is one that I have really been enjoying lately. (For obvious seasonal reasons).

"I like blue skies and hot nights, kisses by the firelight... 

Just like summertime. 

And I like cold sips of soda, picnics on the corner... 

Just like summertime!"

Summertime is my absolute favorite. I love you all, I miss my Provo friends like crazy, and as always... life is so good!

❤, Meagan

All You Can Do is Keep Breathing

I finally feel like I can breathe again! And that is saying something. This last week or so has been nuts! I have put a good 5 hours or so a day into planning for my internship. Friday and Saturday I worked on my curriculum map for like 12 hours, which I FINISHED!! Yay!! :) And Monday I spent the whole day (9-3) at the elementary school with Brittany getting things planned out. Monday was our due date, but we were still feeling in over our heads, so we asked for an extension on the lesson plan due dates. We met again today and spent 9-3 at the school. We managed to finish everything but math! So we are going again tomorrow to finish that. My lesson plans for the first week of school are 30 pages long single spaced on Microsoft Word and counting. It's sort of insane, but I look at them and I am so proud!

Almost every time I go to my school I run into one of the little girls that is in my class. She always says hi to me, and it is exciting! She is a cute girl. I've been called Miss Jardine a lot during practicum and whatnot, but every time she says hi to me I'm like... Holy cow! I'm a teacher! It's official. I'm a grown-up. Sort of. ;)

I was running on only 4 hours of sleep today, so I am amazed that I got as much done as I did. I think I am getting really good at being exhausted all the time, which is actually a good trait for a first year teacher to have! So in that case all is well, haha.

On a happier note, I am going country dancing tonight. For the first time in months!! I am so excited. :) I have been saying that I need to get out more, (and it's very true. I'm a hermit, really.) So this will be fun! I've just been a giant stress case this last week or so, and lamenting the fact that I don't have time for anything fun, so it will be good to get out and blow off some steam. If I can stay awake... ;) I was going to take a nap, but I somehow just got suckered into making dinner.
And after tonight? I will take a deep breath and dive into more deadlines. Wish me luck!... And time for sleep.
❤, Meagan

P.S - The post title comes from this song. It's one of my favorites for when I feel like life is too much too handle. Enjoy. :)

Pandora is my Best Friend

I'm pretty sure no one reads my blog, but I like writing in it anyway. I find that I figure my thoughts out better in writing.

That being said... I don't know why I am so obsessed with this song. Pandora enlightened me to the beauty that is now an obsession of a pretty piano part and soft gorgeous singing. I may have listened to it like 10 times in the last 2 days. SO GOOD! I feel like it connects to my life in so many ways. I know it is sort of sad, but it also sounds really hopeful to me. If you don't love it as much as me, then sorry for wasting your time, but I wanted to share. :) 

Maybe I should start a music blog or something. I sure share a lot of songs. 

I hope your days were wonderful. 

Lots of love!

❤, Meagan

The Whole World is Moving and I'm Standing Still

Lately I've been feeling simultaneously like life is going way too fast for me to keep up with, but also like I'm not moving at all. I don't get it. It's confusing, and sort of exhausting.

I may or may not be afflicted by the Senior-at-BYU/slightly-marriage-hungry syndrome. But in my defense, it's sort of hard not to be when people keep asking how you've been at BYU for 4 years and aren't married yet. I blame it on the height. It also doesn't help that every day I log onto facebook I am alerted to either new engagements or pregnancies. I feel like all those that I knew or once dated (especially those I dated) are getting engaged or married and moving on with their lives. So, guys... If you want to get married, date me (interpret that how you will).

I feel like I am barely keeping afloat with school. 17 credits and the impending practicum are really taking their toll on me. Who needs free time? Oh, wait - me. In that case... Sleep is overrated, right? ;) As I've sat here at my little table in the good ol' library, 2 different people have come and sat with me, finished homework, and left. What am I still doing here?? (Other than writing this blog post, because obviously... This is important).

But don't let me fool you... life is not entirely awful. I am done with all of my homework that is due tonight and tomorrow. I have a few things to tackle for Friday, and I am determined to get all of Monday's homework done as well so I can go out of town with some friends and play all weekend. I desperately need a break.

Also- I went to a book sale at Provo library today and bought 20 books for $20! How cool is that?? I am so excited to keep building up my classroom library and help kids to love reading like I do! :)
That's all for now, folks. I need to get back to the books...

Oh, and in case any of you were curious about the title of this post - Give this song a listen. It's a good one. :)
❤, Meagan

Everything Will Be Wonderful Someday :)

So... I realized that I have not updated my blog since my last woe-is-me post. This is just to say that life doesn't always suck. Actually, it's rather fantastic right now. In a week and a half I will be finished with finals, and a few days later I'll be all moved home with the family. I can't believe this school year is almost over. When did I get grown up enough to be halfway done with college? Haha. :)
     A few people, upon hearing of my great distress which resulted in my last blog post, jumped right in to make my life a little better. My mom sent me a care package. Or a happy package? Haha. I like that. It had a sweet little card in it, and some chocolate and a bright blue t-shirt with this huge smiley face on it. It was super cute and it brightened my spirits a lot. My friend Ash sent me a card too. It was fun to get unexpected mail twice in one week. I'm so glad to know that I have special people in my life that I can count on when things get tough. :) I certainly do have some amazing people in my life.
     And now for a short recap: Lots of things, mostly good, have happened in my life since my last blog post. I have come to terms with all the changes that made me so unhappy previously. While they are not ideal, I will make the best of them, because that's what I do. I'm that notorious "glass half full" person. In the last month or so I have aced a few tests, done badly on a few others, gotten an A on that paper that stressed me out so much, made new friends, had some grand adventures, and spent lots of time with family. All in all... I can say that life is wonderful! :) Which reminds me of a song... I love this song. Listen to it when you're unhappy. And remember: "You've got to look yourself in the eye and say 'I am wonderful!'"
❤, Meagan