Lately I've been feeling simultaneously like life is going way too fast for me to keep up with, but also like I'm not moving at all. I don't get it. It's confusing, and sort of exhausting.
I may or may not be afflicted by the Senior-at-BYU/slightly-marriage-hungry syndrome. But in my defense, it's sort of hard not to be when people keep asking how you've been at BYU for 4 years and aren't married yet. I blame it on the height. It also doesn't help that every day I log onto facebook I am alerted to either new engagements or pregnancies. I feel like all those that I knew or once dated (especially those I dated) are getting engaged or married and moving on with their lives. So, guys... If you want to get married, date me (interpret that how you will).
I feel like I am barely keeping afloat with school. 17 credits and the impending practicum are really taking their toll on me. Who needs free time? Oh, wait - me. In that case... Sleep is overrated, right? ;) As I've sat here at my little table in the good ol' library, 2 different people have come and sat with me, finished homework, and left. What am I still doing here?? (Other than writing this blog post, because obviously... This is important).
But don't let me fool you... life is not entirely awful. I am done with all of my homework that is due tonight and tomorrow. I have a few things to tackle for Friday, and I am determined to get all of Monday's homework done as well so I can go out of town with some friends and play all weekend. I desperately need a break.
Also- I went to a book sale at Provo library today and bought 20 books for $20! How cool is that?? I am so excited to keep building up my classroom library and help kids to love reading like I do! :)
That's all for now, folks. I need to get back to the books...
Oh, and in case any of you were curious about the title of this post - Give this song a listen. It's a good one. :)
❤, Meagan
Showing posts with label Angst. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Angst. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Thursday, December 27, 2012
I Believe in God... Am I Unintelligent?
Today I had someone question my intelligence because I believe in God. According to them, the mark of true intelligence is in not confusing "fact" with "fiction". This honestly made me quite angry. I do not understand how someone can think me less intelligent for believing in a higher power and belonging to an organized religion. Personally, I think religion says a lot about a person's character, but not necessarily anything about their intelligence. In my opinion intelligence is seen in one's responsibility, formal schooling, and ability to make important life decisions.
Rather than a lack of intelligence, I think the fact that I believe in God shows that I am capable of having hope. I have strength enough to believe in the unseen forces at play in my life, and I am informed of what comes after this life. I do not see what portion of that makes me less intelligent than anyone else. My faith in God is not due to lack of information, but rather studying and seeking to find out for myself. As you all may remember from a previous post, it was only through diligence and hard work that I was able to come to this belief in the first place. If anything, I believe that I am more informed about life than those that don't believe in God or His works. Regardless of these feelings of mine, I do not think that it is ever acceptable to personally attack another person for something as personal as their religion.
I don't mean to rant and rave; I guess all I am trying to say is that people are different, and that is respectable. Intelligence does not lie in one's ability to believe that there is something bigger out there. If my friend is an Atheist I won't look down on them or think them stupid, I will love and respect them for their beliefs. I would love it if others could do the same for me.
❤, Meagan
Rather than a lack of intelligence, I think the fact that I believe in God shows that I am capable of having hope. I have strength enough to believe in the unseen forces at play in my life, and I am informed of what comes after this life. I do not see what portion of that makes me less intelligent than anyone else. My faith in God is not due to lack of information, but rather studying and seeking to find out for myself. As you all may remember from a previous post, it was only through diligence and hard work that I was able to come to this belief in the first place. If anything, I believe that I am more informed about life than those that don't believe in God or His works. Regardless of these feelings of mine, I do not think that it is ever acceptable to personally attack another person for something as personal as their religion.
I don't mean to rant and rave; I guess all I am trying to say is that people are different, and that is respectable. Intelligence does not lie in one's ability to believe that there is something bigger out there. If my friend is an Atheist I won't look down on them or think them stupid, I will love and respect them for their beliefs. I would love it if others could do the same for me.
❤, Meagan
Monday, June 20, 2011
Mixed Feelings is When...
I really tried to think of a good title for this. Particularly a witty one. I failed. It's kind of just a random assortment of thoughts I've had over the last few days.
In the words of a wise professor: "Mixed feelings is when your mother-in-law drives your brand new Cadillac off of a cliff". I thought this was so funny, and it is probably one of my very favorite things to come out of the mouth of any of my professors last year.
This concept in general is just something that I've been thinking about lately. A few examples I have found in my life the past few days include (but are not limited to) :
- Remember that one song that you used to love? You know the one. The one that now reminds you of a particular person, so you skip it every time it comes up on your ipod? Yep, that one.
- You know those certain placess that have the power to make you happy/excited/sad/nostalgic all at the same time? I think we all have those. This broad range of feelings is because you think not only of all the amazing things that happened there, but also of how long ago that really was, and how much you miss the people that were there with you.
- One more thing. I know that we all have little rituals. Like... Kissing your hand and palming the roof when you run a yellow light, or knocking on wood to avoid jinxing yourself, right? Well there are those in particular which, to begin with, yeilded multiple positive results, but just one time proved for a negative and/or awkward experience. Every time the opportunity would present itself after that, you didn't do it. And every time you kicked yourself for remembering the bad and caring enough to pass it up.
Life is funny. It's unpredictable, and you can't control the way your mind connects things. So as a result one thing can remind you of like twelve others, but we can make the most of it!
Now every time that one song comes up I try to remember why I loved it in the first place, and instead of skipping it, turn up the volume and jam out like I used to. And when I drive past those places I loved... of course I reminisce, but I try to filter it so only the happy feelings get through and I can drive by with a smile. That way I can remember and enjoy those places that I loved all over again. And my silly little rituals? Well I figure if they used to be fun and exciting, Why shouldn't they still be? Now every time the opportunity presents itself I still hesitate; but then I do it anyway, just in case... :)
One bad experience can't define them all. We can choose how certain things effect us. Let's pick the positive result. :)
❤, Meagan
In the words of a wise professor: "Mixed feelings is when your mother-in-law drives your brand new Cadillac off of a cliff". I thought this was so funny, and it is probably one of my very favorite things to come out of the mouth of any of my professors last year.
This concept in general is just something that I've been thinking about lately. A few examples I have found in my life the past few days include (but are not limited to) :
- Remember that one song that you used to love? You know the one. The one that now reminds you of a particular person, so you skip it every time it comes up on your ipod? Yep, that one.
- You know those certain placess that have the power to make you happy/excited/sad/nostalgic all at the same time? I think we all have those. This broad range of feelings is because you think not only of all the amazing things that happened there, but also of how long ago that really was, and how much you miss the people that were there with you.
- One more thing. I know that we all have little rituals. Like... Kissing your hand and palming the roof when you run a yellow light, or knocking on wood to avoid jinxing yourself, right? Well there are those in particular which, to begin with, yeilded multiple positive results, but just one time proved for a negative and/or awkward experience. Every time the opportunity would present itself after that, you didn't do it. And every time you kicked yourself for remembering the bad and caring enough to pass it up.
Life is funny. It's unpredictable, and you can't control the way your mind connects things. So as a result one thing can remind you of like twelve others, but we can make the most of it!
Now every time that one song comes up I try to remember why I loved it in the first place, and instead of skipping it, turn up the volume and jam out like I used to. And when I drive past those places I loved... of course I reminisce, but I try to filter it so only the happy feelings get through and I can drive by with a smile. That way I can remember and enjoy those places that I loved all over again. And my silly little rituals? Well I figure if they used to be fun and exciting, Why shouldn't they still be? Now every time the opportunity presents itself I still hesitate; but then I do it anyway, just in case... :)
One bad experience can't define them all. We can choose how certain things effect us. Let's pick the positive result. :)
❤, Meagan
Monday, February 28, 2011
From Bad to Ice Cream
So far my week has been full of frustration. And it's only Monday. What, you may ask, has me stressed this early in the week? Well, I am going to answer you!
- Firstly, assignments that you totally gave precedence over others and took you forever to do (as in a whole Saturday) being postponed a month. Then having to complete the others with not much time to do it in.
- Finally learning you got accepted into your major, and being happy for an hour or so until you go talk to an advisor, where you are told that the class that has been the bane of your existence all semester is now no longer required. As well as half of the classes you took last semester, and the feeling that this whole school year has been a waste of time.
- Realizing that next semester your major wants you in 18 credits, and the 15 you have now is already almost too much to handle.
- Upon realizing how burned out you currently are, you then realize that you are going to be in college for a whole year longer than planned.... Also add to this a huge homework load and visiting teaching on the last night of the month.
- Calling your older sister and crying for 45 minutes can help a little though. Except for then being completely exhausted since crying is such an energy sapper.
But, after all this... You know what helps ease some of the frustration? And maybe even makes you forget about the bad things for a little bit? A caring roommate who sees you're upset and takes you out for your favorite kind of ice cream. (Actually I took her, as I am the one with the car) But she bought mine, and I was happy. Chocolate brownie ice cream has a way of making life better, if only for a little while.
❤, Meagan
- Firstly, assignments that you totally gave precedence over others and took you forever to do (as in a whole Saturday) being postponed a month. Then having to complete the others with not much time to do it in.
- Finally learning you got accepted into your major, and being happy for an hour or so until you go talk to an advisor, where you are told that the class that has been the bane of your existence all semester is now no longer required. As well as half of the classes you took last semester, and the feeling that this whole school year has been a waste of time.
- Realizing that next semester your major wants you in 18 credits, and the 15 you have now is already almost too much to handle.
- Upon realizing how burned out you currently are, you then realize that you are going to be in college for a whole year longer than planned.... Also add to this a huge homework load and visiting teaching on the last night of the month.
- Calling your older sister and crying for 45 minutes can help a little though. Except for then being completely exhausted since crying is such an energy sapper.
But, after all this... You know what helps ease some of the frustration? And maybe even makes you forget about the bad things for a little bit? A caring roommate who sees you're upset and takes you out for your favorite kind of ice cream. (Actually I took her, as I am the one with the car) But she bought mine, and I was happy. Chocolate brownie ice cream has a way of making life better, if only for a little while.
❤, Meagan
Thursday, January 6, 2011
School
Christmas break is over, sadly. It was wonderful being home with family, but now it is back to reality or, as I like to call it... School. And school is back in full force right from day one. I'm taking 15 credits this semester, which is 6 classes. This is 2 more credits than last semester, but one less class. I figured it would average out to about the same difficulty, but if the first 3 days of classes are any indicator then this semester is going to be pret-ty intense.
Homework on the first day of classes, and 2 days of night classes? Not my favorite thing ever. Especially when those 2 night classes are almost 3 hours long each with no break in the middle. And I am barely getting home from campus at 10 o' clock at night. Yeah... Awesome.
But... Despite how much I hate it in the moment, in the end I will accomplish my dream and become an elementary school teacher just like I've always wanted to. So why complain, right? I just might survive this…
❤, Meagan
Homework on the first day of classes, and 2 days of night classes? Not my favorite thing ever. Especially when those 2 night classes are almost 3 hours long each with no break in the middle. And I am barely getting home from campus at 10 o' clock at night. Yeah... Awesome.
But... Despite how much I hate it in the moment, in the end I will accomplish my dream and become an elementary school teacher just like I've always wanted to. So why complain, right? I just might survive this…
❤, Meagan
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