Dear Grandma and Grandpa . . .

(This blog post is from the beginning of October. Apparently I forgot to post it, because I found it hanging out in my drafts.)

..………………………………………………...

We learned the proper format for writing letters this week. Ones like these remind me why I wanted to teach.

Dear Grandma & Grandpa
how are you doing I love you. I am likeing 3rd grade! my teachers names miss Jardine, she is nice.
I hope you are great! I leaned multition, and divition. we leaned cusive, letters, and Riverton,.
you are a good grandma and grandpa! what was your favorite grade?
will you please write Back?

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,
     Hello! How are you doing? I am doing great and in third grade I am learning so much stuff! I love learning.
     In third grade I have a really nice teacher. We have learnd a lot from her and that is why we are really smart and know everything in third grade. We have learned about area, proper nouns, multiplication and division. We have learned so much from the best teacher ever. At home I like to read and play piano. I love it.
     I have some questions. How old are you. When can I come over to your house and What is your favorite color. please write me back

And then, there's this one...

Dear Granma and Grandpa,
Hello! How ar you? I am oing good I miss you. I hope we well see echuther soon
My sub is (_____) and she is mean. My teacher is mean     I think we shold be oof track we Hav to wat this weak and two mor. I am doing good at Hom
well you wight me back please


Guess who my little toughie is? Oh well. You can't please them all. But I really do love this teaching gig. :)
♥, Meagan

I Can't Complain!

Wow. Saying that this internship would keep me busy was an understatement. This internship is my LIFE! I get to school around 7:30 every morning, then stay until 6 every night when the janitor makes me go home. Then I lug a bunch of papers and notebooks and things to grade home with me and do that most of the night. And when I finally do get the chance to be social... What do I talk about? School. This happened, and this student said this, and oh my goodness I have to get this done... Sheesh. It's consumed me. Don't get me wrong, I really love this job. But it is so hard! I really miss having a life outside of school.

I have decided that nothing is harder than teaching while sick. This last week has been so taxing. I have been trying to get over a cold for about a week and a half now. Last Saturday was the worst of it. I got to sleep in until 9 (I love how that is sleeping in for me now), woke up coughing so hard I couldn't breathe, begged Samantha to take me to the store for cough drops and a Jamba Juice, then watched a bit of TV before deciding that after being up for a whopping 3 hours I needed a nap. I was in and out of bed all day (mostly in), before begging my dad to make me soup, and finally calling my facilitator around 6:30 to freak out about how I hadn't been able to get any lesson planning done yet. I sort of broke down on the phone (so embarrassing), at which she basically told me to go to bed and try again the next day. Normally my whole weeks' worth of lesson plans would be due Monday morning by 8am, but she took pity on my and said to just get Monday done and we could take it a day at a time. I was grateful, but not being ahead of the game stresses me out. Also, I knew that I was being observed for my JPAS (Jordan District teacher observation system where the principal randomly comes in twice in a week-ish time frame to observe your teaching)... and I had an inkling that it was going to be on Monday. So Monday I got out of bed, forced myself to school, and put on a brave, although still coughing, face. I survived my observation that day, switching classrooms the next (again- yay for the track change being in the middle of the week instead of on Fridays like usual...), and another observation Thursday afternoon. This week was the hardest week of my life, I swear it. But I made it through, and I'm pretty positive that I can handle whatever else this internship will throw at me.

I promise more details later. Every day is a new and exciting experience; for better or for worse. I am not short on stories, but I am definitely short on time to write them all down.

With all the ups and downs I feel like this song should be my life motto right about now. It just rings so true to this whole internship thing! Enjoy. :)

"I know some days I'm gonna stumble, and I know the cookie's gonna crumble, and I know life is gonna suck some days... But I can't complain!"

In conclusion: As exhausting and difficult as this experience has been so far, every single time one of my students says something nice about me or gives me a hug, I just melt. It reminds me why I wanted to do this in the first place, and shows me that even when I feel like giving up I am making a difference!!

So, with that in mind: Life is beautiful!... Mostly.
♥, Meagan

Small Moments

I know you are all dying to hear about my internship. Or maybe not, but regardless... I just haven't had time to report much. Here's a little peek at my last minute preparation for it, even if it was mostly just mental prep.

On Wednesday my school was closed, because it was a holiday (Pioneer Day) and school was starting the next day, so it was pretty much do or die at that point. I had to go to Provo to grab some mail since the school district keeps sending it to Provo instead of South Jordan no matter how many times I remind them that I don't live in Provo. After getting my mail, I had time to catch up with friends and roommates, and enlist help in cutting out lamination (yeah, more! It never ends.)  I decided to leave for home earlier than I normally would have had school not been starting the next day. (Eep!) I was a little bit in freak-out mode, as every mile got me closer to home and bed, and school starting the next day! But then, amidst all the driving and psyching myself out I looked out the window and  I saw the prettiest clouds! They looked something like this:

It was then I realized that there is beauty all around me, and I need to take the time to stop and enjoy it... Especially when I feel like I don't have time to. I don't want to get so stressed that all I see is negative. I want to remember to notice the small, simple and beautiful things in my life.

I absolutely love it when the sky looks like this. It makes me feel like I am looking straight at Heaven. This moment just reminded me that yes, this internship is scary and intensely overwhelming, but I am not alone. I have a loving Heavenly Father that will be right there for me every step of the way. When I feel like I'm drowning, and I just can't do it all I know that He will provide the motivation and the means for me to accomplish all things. It was a great moment for me, and it gave me such an immense feeling of peace! From that moment I felt like I could handle things. Even as I woke up and prepared for that first morning, and as the parents/kids started filing in, I was able to calmly greet them and present a well put together front. This peace has carried me through these first 2 days, and I am so thankful for that! I am incredibly grateful for this opportunity and the knowledge that I am doing what I am meant to be, and also for the knowledge that I CAN DO HARD THINGS and in turn, accomplish GREAT things. :)

Here's to an undoubtedly fantastic year!

♥, Meagan

Perfection vs. Perfectionism

This week in institute we were talking about self-esteem and why it is so important in our lives and our relationships. One boy mentioned that there is a difference between being a perfectionist and striving for perfection. At first thought I didn't see it, but as he explained: You do not have to be perfect. Do not beat yourself up or go into bouts of self-loathing every time you make a mistake. IT'S OK TO MESS UP! Christ doesn't expect us to be perfect, so we shouldn't either. What is expected is that we strive for eventual perfection, and keep moving towards it. The most important thing is the happiness that we find along the way. As cheesy as that sounds - we really are meant to be happy. This life is all about finding our place in the world, finding what and who we love, and making the best of every situation.

On a related note, I found this quote and I like it: 

"Perfection means not perfect actions in a perfect world, but appropriate actions in an imperfect one."

As I have given this concept more thought this week, and simultaneously realized that my first day of school is 3 weeks from yesterday (eek!), I have realized that this internship is going to be the most intensely difficult (duh), but also the most rewarding thing I have ever done. It will be hard. I will struggle, I will encounter some failures, and there will probably be plenty of tears. This is going to be tough on my perfectionist nature. But... I am confident that there will be moments of greatness. I will triumph, I will laugh, I will love each of my little kiddos, and I will know that I am making a difference. It would be completely unrealistic to expect or even try for a perfect experience. So instead I will just do my best and love every minute of it! :)

❤, Meagan

A Vision of Summer (Friends, Family, Parks, Swimming, and Picnics!)

Lately I have realized that I believe you have to make it through the mundane in order to get to the amazing - the things you really love. I feel like that's what this summer has been about for me. I am learning to work first and play later, which should be my mantra, but all too often is not. My summer started out like this:

Lamination has become the bane of my existence pretty much.

Because of the seemingly endless amounts of cutting, creativity, and writing of lesson plans that has been required of me this summer I have definitely had a woe-is-me, I'm so busy I don't even know what to do with myself attitude about summer so far. But don't worry, because I have recently stepped back and reevaluated things. I have actually had way more fun than I realized along the way. So without further adieu, here are a few of my summer shenanigans!! 

In the process of all this lovely craziness I have decided that SUMMER IS FOR....

...Saran Wrap! Ok, maybe not just Saran Wrap. I think it was the amazing people that I had the time to bond with (see what I did there?) while wrapped in it. I have really missed the social aspect of Provo and BYU, and I had the chance a few weeks ago to spend a few nights in Provo. In another post I mentioned being Saran wrapped to a bunch of other people, and true to form I took forever to get pictures up. But behold: It was fantastic fun. :)

We are having so much
fun! (Lisa is hidden in the back
where you can't see her.)

Robbie is a beast! And I was
falling over (as much as
possible while attached
to 4 other people.)

The aftermath. :)

...Parks! Summer is a time of graduation and celebration. But also lots and lots of playing. Preferably on playgrounds. Who says I have to be a grown up in order to have a big kid job? 

Don't let my happy face fool you. This was a VERY painful experience.
But a cute picture!

COUSINS!! As close as this pretty girl lives,
I do not see her nearly enough!

...Swimming! Going swimming is always the highlight of my summer. Sadly, I have only had the chance to go once this year. But I plan to make time for much more of that. :)

A new swimsuit definitely warranted a cheesy selfie.

...Pretty flowers! I love watching all the roses bloom on my mom's rosebushes. They brighten my day every time I walk through the yard. :)

They went from this....

.....to this in a matter of days! Amazing!

...Picnics!! Picnics are my favorite! I love taking the time to go enjoy the sunshine and eat in the grass with people I love.

We went on a Sunday picnic!
And waded in the creek. :)

I super love this picture. :) 

Summer is also for... Sandals! And soda! And pretty green grass. :) And baseball games! I don't usually love baseball, but we go every year for a company party for my dad. This year I enjoyed it more than usual. I think it's probably because I've been so stressed with getting ready for my internship. I've had some big due dates in the last week or so and since I got it all done I FINALLY had time to kick back and relax a bit. I think I forgot what that was like. :)

I think the scariest part of my summer internship planning is over (at least for now... fingers crossed) but we all know it only gets worse from here. So in the mean time I am going to make time for more fun things! So far all I have is Lagoon on my agenda. We are going next week for a daddy/daughters day! But other than that? I am very open to suggestions. Bring on summer. :)

Wait a minute! My post wouldn't be complete without a song now, would it? Here is one that I have really been enjoying lately. (For obvious seasonal reasons).

"I like blue skies and hot nights, kisses by the firelight... 

Just like summertime. 

And I like cold sips of soda, picnics on the corner... 

Just like summertime!"

Summertime is my absolute favorite. I love you all, I miss my Provo friends like crazy, and as always... life is so good!

❤, Meagan

All You Can Do is Keep Breathing

I finally feel like I can breathe again! And that is saying something. This last week or so has been nuts! I have put a good 5 hours or so a day into planning for my internship. Friday and Saturday I worked on my curriculum map for like 12 hours, which I FINISHED!! Yay!! :) And Monday I spent the whole day (9-3) at the elementary school with Brittany getting things planned out. Monday was our due date, but we were still feeling in over our heads, so we asked for an extension on the lesson plan due dates. We met again today and spent 9-3 at the school. We managed to finish everything but math! So we are going again tomorrow to finish that. My lesson plans for the first week of school are 30 pages long single spaced on Microsoft Word and counting. It's sort of insane, but I look at them and I am so proud!

Almost every time I go to my school I run into one of the little girls that is in my class. She always says hi to me, and it is exciting! She is a cute girl. I've been called Miss Jardine a lot during practicum and whatnot, but every time she says hi to me I'm like... Holy cow! I'm a teacher! It's official. I'm a grown-up. Sort of. ;)

I was running on only 4 hours of sleep today, so I am amazed that I got as much done as I did. I think I am getting really good at being exhausted all the time, which is actually a good trait for a first year teacher to have! So in that case all is well, haha.

On a happier note, I am going country dancing tonight. For the first time in months!! I am so excited. :) I have been saying that I need to get out more, (and it's very true. I'm a hermit, really.) So this will be fun! I've just been a giant stress case this last week or so, and lamenting the fact that I don't have time for anything fun, so it will be good to get out and blow off some steam. If I can stay awake... ;) I was going to take a nap, but I somehow just got suckered into making dinner.
And after tonight? I will take a deep breath and dive into more deadlines. Wish me luck!... And time for sleep.
❤, Meagan

P.S - The post title comes from this song. It's one of my favorites for when I feel like life is too much too handle. Enjoy. :)

Beautiful/Crazy/Busy/Amazing!

I guess I lied about writing once a week. I'm sort of going crazy with all this internship stuff. On the bright side... Somebody needed advice on their own planning yesterday and asked me for help because I seem so on top of things! That was a confidence booster. :) However, right now all I am doing is procrastinating. That's when I get really good at writing in my blog. ;)

The other day I was doing some stats on my internship so far.
I have currently spent about $100 of my own money getting ready for it,
I have spent 7.5 hours (if you count time of people helping me) just cutting out lamination,
I have had about 24 hours worth of (unpaid) meetings so far this summer,
And I have put more hours into preparing for it than I can even count right now.

Someone mentioned to me the other day that they never understood why people go back to college for degree after degree, but then they decided that it's because college is so much easier than real-life jobs! I completely agree, haha. This is nuts.
Good thing I chose to do something that I love!

Status Update:
I had a birthday since my last post! I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22! ;)
I also started contributing to my friend's gratitude blog. I don't write in it as often as I should. (Common theme?) But it helps me remember during all the stress what is so great about my life. And there are lots of wonderful things! Check it out if you so desire. :) http://pointsofgratitude.blogspot.com/
I got to go swimming the other night! It was sort of freezing, and we had to be quiet so their neighbors wouldn't call the cops, but it was fun, and it made this summer finally actually FEEL like summer. (An entire month in.)
Also- I went to Provo and hung out with all my Provo friends for the weekend. It may have involved tennis, handstands, Zumba, and being completely wrapped up/stuck to someone else via Saran Wrap. I was sore for like 3 days! My life doesn't get that exciting at home. I miss college!

Anyway... I really do love this beautiful, crazy, BUSY but amazing life!!
❤, Meagan

I'm a Big Kid Now!

Contrary to the slogan I stole for my title, the purpose of this post is not to announce that I am finally potty-trained. Fortunately, that happened a LONG time ago. Although... speaking of being a little baby... Yesterday my parents and I were in a total panic because my birth certificate was missing. I needed to get my license renewed before Saturday (my birthday!) and my parents had misplaced it. I was all paranoid that the DMV wouldn't accept my other "unofficial" one that we had used my whole life, and I would have to be driven around like a 12-year-old until we could get me a new one. And I was frustrated that my existence/old driver's license would not have been enough to prove that I was 1) BORN, and 2) Who I say I am. So we ordered a new one last night ($42.50! Who knew that shipping on a single piece of paper can cost $19?? Ridiculous.) In the mean-time I was going to just try my luck with the unofficial one.

Anyway... Today I did a lot of grown-up real world things. Like go to new employee orientation for my teaching job! (Guess what I found in the envelope with my social security card when they made a copy of that? You guessed it, my birth certificate. Holy cow.) After that I went and got my picture taken for my teacher ID badge, which I should get in a few days. Then I went to the DMV and got my license renewed. I get a horizontal one this time. I'm a real grown-up now! Now I can go clubbing "at-a-glance". Not that I will... But my picture this time is far better than the last one, so I guess that's good. Since I accomplished all of this before noon, I treated myself to lunch at Costa Vida. Yum! I love that place. :) Then I came home and napped for an hour. One of these days I will even tackle the growing pile of laundry in my closet.

I never reported on the PRAXIS! That was an interesting experience. I had to either wear short sleeves or pull up my sleeves for the test administrators. And I wasn't wearing socks, so I didn't have to pull up my pant legs like everyone else. I did have to leave my jacket and purse in a locker, though, write a whole paragraph pledging to be ethical (in cursive! Those of you who wonder why you have to learn cursive in 3rd grade because you only ever write your name with it?... That is why, apparently. It is "harder to forge. Especially a whole paragraph." I'm pretty sure it took me a lot longer than it should have) and I got metal detector wanded, signed my name to enter, had my picture taken,  and was personally walked to my seat by one of the test center workers. It was super quiet in there, and there were cameras on the ceiling. It was quite an intimidating atmosphere. However, I actually did REALLY well. :) I think I got a perfect score on the math part! I felt like the real test was much easier than the practice ones that I took online. I had no reason to be so scared! It felt so good to finally be done with it after dreading it for months (and paying $150 for a computerized test. Also ridiculous.)

One more thing - I went to a meeting for my internship on Friday, and the facilitator that I was working with informed me that I am WAY ahead on planning at this point. So my weeks of being stressed and overwhelmed have totally paid off! I was super relieved. Probably a little too relieved, because I haven't actually worked on anything for it since then. Oops!

I hope all of your lives are wonderful, and I will try to go back to writing at least once a week. (I guess it's only been 3 weeks since my last post. That's not too bad, right?) I'm a slacker. Between nannying and internship prep I haven't actually had much downtime this summer. Regardless... Life is great! Busy, but oh so good. :)
❤, Meagan

Summer is for Relaxing?... Psych! Here Comes the PRAXIS!!

Prioritize... Procrastinate... Both P-words, but I am way better at one than the other. Guess which?

As far as prioritizing goes, I spent the last 4 days of my life thoroughly deep-cleaning my bedroom here at home so that I could unpack all of my school stuff and move in long-term. (Still so weird to think about.) But, I am taking the PRAXIS (another P-word!) Wednesday (In like 36 hours!), and I am really struggling to get motivated to study. Told you I was better at one than the other. However, I made myself a friendly reminder and I think it may help me out a little bit:

Or maybe not. We'll see if it has any effect on me tomorrow.

But for now I am going to enjoy some home-cooked food that I did not have to make (yes, at 11:30 at night. Maybe I'm a little unconventional.) And go to bed eventually. I have an entire days' worth of studying ahead of me!
❤, Meagan

BYU, the Final Chapter!

It is officially here... The day that I have looked forward to for the last 4 years. And now I am dreading it? Something is wrong with me.

Every single college "first" was so exciting! I remember feeling like such a grown up the first time I payed rent, the first night that I spent away from home in my very own permanent residence, the first time I went grocery shopping and bought whatever I wanted without someone questioning my spending habits (it would have been very helpful for someone to question my spending habits these last 4 years), the first time I left my apartment at like 1 in the morning and didn't have to tell anyone where I was going, my first day of classes, my first college test (not so exciting once I saw my score), my first finals week, my first calling that wasn't in the Young Women organization (relief society pianist - surprise, surprise!), and everything else! It was so exhilarating!

The time really has flown. I remember feeling like college was soooooo long, and I would never be done. And "holy cow, 4 years is forever... It's like high school all over again!" But, the difference was... I hated high school. College has been the best part of my life so far. If I could freeze time right now and not really have to be done I might just do that. Living in Provo has been so good for me. I have grown so much as a person, both spiritually and in my education. And I have met tons of special and wonderful people that have given me so much happiness and good memories!

All of my college "lasts" have also been exciting, don't get me wrong, but they are sad as well! Samantha (my little sister) asked me a few weeks ago if I was excited to be working on one of my last ever final projects and I said no. She looked at me like I was crazy, and I said "Because that means that I am almost done with college!" She was like... "And you don't want to be?" Me: "No!" 

These last few weeks I payed my last rent check, GOT AN INTERNSHIP (Yay!), had my last college class, took my last final (just today, actually), and last night as I was laying in bed talking with my roommate at 2 in the morning about laser hair removal... hahaha... I realized that I only have a few more days of that! I love random 2am conversations with the roommates, and I am now almost done with my college roommate experience! I have had so many ups and downs in that area, but mostly ups... So I am sad to be done with that, too!

Anyway... As mixed as my feelings about everything are, I know that it is time that I move on with my life, whether I feel ready or not. Good things may be ending, but even better things are beginning! I am accomplishing my dreams and moving on in the world, and that is even more exciting than those things that are coming to a close. Life is so amazing!!! And my dear friends who are still in college and struggling through finals/gearing up for next semester... Please don't take it for granted. Because I miss it already!!

❤, Meagan

'Cause You're Amazing, Just the Way You Are!

I saw this video the other day, and I absolutely loved it.  It has such a good message! If you haven't seen it yet you should definitely take a few minutes to watch it.

I think it is so sad that we women see ourselves this way. I think it is true that women are especially prone to negative images of ourselves, but I think that men can also can be their own worst critics. This video specifically talks about beauty, which I think is a very sensitive subject for some individuals. However, I think we are overly critical of ourselves in pretty much every aspect of our lives. We may not be as talented of cooks or singers or athletes as we wish. Maybe we are having a bad hair day, or our face is breaking out. Whatever it is... It does not define you. We've all heard that "God doesn't make mistakes." I sincerely believe that. You are how He intended you to be. :) Rejoice in that. 

I think it is time that we all wake up to how wonderful we really are. And preferably do it in time for finals.

Happy first day of finals, everyone! You've got this. :)

❤, Meagan

And So it Begins!...

Now that this semester is winding down I think my brain needs something else to worry about, since finals totally aren't enough... So I had this hilarious dream the other night, which is great because normally I can't remember my dreams for more than like the 30 seconds right after I wake up. It was my very first "Oh no, it is the first day of school and I'm not ready!" dream. It has begun, ladies and gents. This internship is getting so real and close!

In this dream I dreamed that I was at the school I am doing my internship at. I woke up like 10 minutes before school was supposed to start (in a bed... in my classroom. Apparently this was not all that strange in this dreamscape.) Anyway... I started flipping out because the kids were going to show up and I was in my pajamas. I was freaking out because I did not have extra clothes to wear at school (What, I have a bed and PJ's but no change of clothes? I would be a horrible boy scout.)

At this point I saw my facilitator walk by (the person that is my connection between BYU and my elementary school) and I called out to her... "Elisa!" (I think that is her name. I will have to check again.) "I am freaking out! I am not ready! Will you stay here while my class shows up so I can go home and change?" But she told me that she was leaving for the day, so she could not help me out. Then one of my students showed up and said "Hi, Miss Jardine!" Then I really started freaking out and I was super embarrassed about my unprofessional attire. What are their parents going to think?? So I told her that I would be back and started running (literally) all over the school looking for a change of clothes.

And then I woke up. And cracked up! I am so glad I don't plan on sleeping in my classroom so situations like this will never occur, hahaha. Oh, my brain comes up with the silliest things. :) I love my life. :)

❤, Meagan

You are Not Horrible People

Today someone got up during testimony meeting in church and prefaced his testimony with "You are not horrible people." This kind of took me off guard, but then he reminded us that we all make mistakes and that we all sin. We are not a perfect people, and God loves us regardless. Quite frankly... We are probably doing better than we think we are. We are our own worst critics, after all.

I sincerely believe that this life is not a time to dwell on our imperfections. At least not in an unhealthy way.  In all honesty, complete perfection is impossible for us. I don't mean to sound like a Debby Downer, because I do have a hopeful perspective on this. To me, the point of this life is not complete perfection, it is in striving for perfection. But if we work hard and stick to our beliefs, making every effort to draw nearer to Christ, then we will be able to exhibit our best selves and show Him that we are indeed trying, and we are worthy to inherit all that He has. So there you have it. Whatever you are struggling with, whatever imperfections stare you in the mirror, whatever habit you are just unable to break... It does not make you a horrible person. I think we can all use this reminder at times. God knows you personally, and He loves you and recognizes your efforts. Take comfort in that.

Happy Sunday, everybody! :)
❤, Meagan

Moving Up in the World!

I apologize for not writing more during practicum. I usually have lots of funny stories and happy moments to share because of the kids, but this practicum I didn't have a ton of those. I felt like it was a very stressful and unhappy month for me, and I try not to write about things that will bog people down. So instead I counted down the days until it was over and hoped for happier things to share. And now I have some!

Alright, folks... Most of you may know this already, but I GOT AN INTERNSHIP!!! I realized I addressed my nerves in the last post, but I couldn't leave all of my avid readers (not sure I actually have any of those) hanging! And I am so excited I just want to tell anyone who will listen. Or read. :)

I will be teaching 3rd grade at Riverton Elementary School! An internship fills the same requirements as student teaching, but instead of being in someone else's classroom I have my very own classroom and receive half salary. Since it is my own classroom, I will be there for the whole year rather than just one semester. I am also on a year-round schedule, so the first day of school will be July 25th, which is super soon. I got offered the intern position last Wednesday, but I didn't know much information until today when my principal called me to let me know some details.

So my day went like this... I was super stoked to go to devotional for the first time in over a month, and one of the Special Education professors was speaking, so I knew it would be great. As soon as I found my friend and sat down, I got a phone call. Recognizing it as from somewhere back home I went out to the hall to answer it. It was the principal of the school I am doing my internship at! He had called to inform me of what grade I would be teaching. When I asked what track (between A and B) he said that since I was the first intern hired, and he will be hiring another one tomorrow that he will let me pick first and the other intern will get what is left over. I was excited, because I wanted A track. That way I will get out of school in June instead of July. (Those of you who are not familiar with the year-round track system this calendar will give you a good idea of what I am talking about.)

We had a little conversation about other expectations and how I will likely be rotating classrooms every time I go off track. But... There is actually an incentive to that. Apparently I get an extra $100 every time I have to do this. Win! After our little discussion he welcomed me aboard and said that the secretary would be getting in touch with me soon.

And she did! She called me about half an hour later and asked for some information so that she could sign me up for "New teacher orientation"! I am so official!! Now that I have some more information about this whole thing it is getting so real! I am so incredibly excited, but also nervous! I'm not really sure when I grew up enough to be in charge of helping to shape 25 young peoples' futures.

Anyway... From our short conversation, my principal seems very nice, and I am looking forward to working with him. (And hopefully a friend, if the other intern is someone that I get along well with.) Life is really looking up and I am definitely moving up in the world. :)

Also look at this website. It's my future home. So excited!!! :)
❤, Meagan

The Complete Package

I feel like I have been neglecting my blog lately. It's been 20 days since my last post, and I was doing so well at keeping up! I already posted this on Facebook, but I thought I would share it with my blog friends too. While perusing Facebook the other day I found out that BYU students (That's me!) are the complete package. Don't believe me? Check it!

Colleges Where Students are Hot and Smart

I figured that BYU would be on there, since like 4 of my friends posted the link. However, I didn't expect us to be THE hottest and smartest. Go us! :)

BYU-Idaho made it, too! (Although it is at a slightly less awesome placement than BYU-Provo)

Talk about good press. ;)

I hope all of your lives are wonderful and less stressful than mine has been lately. But it's all downhill from here! My last day of practicum is Wednesday, my internship interview is also on Wednesday, and I should find out that very night whether or not I get it. Updates will come at a later date. Until then I will be a nervous wreck, so wish me luck!

Lots of love!

❤, Meagan

iTeach

I decided that I sort of love 6th graders' humor. Today, one of the boys in my class jumped out of his seat completely out of the blue, and asked "What would you guys say to us doing a Harlem Shake?" That's one of those moments where you have to bite your lip and not acknowledge that the disruptive child is funny. He asked his teacher if they could and she said no. Then he said "What about at recess?" She still said no, and he was a little let down. No one else seemed too torn up about it, though.

We get to go on a field trip tomorrow! To BYU... haha. I can't escape the place! But we are going to the planetarium, so I think it'll be pretty cool. My first observation is also tomorrow. Right after a field trip and recess, so hopefully the kids aren't too wild. I'm teaching them how to write persuasive essays, which is a super fascinating topic. But really... I'm excited to read them. I'm having them write me a persuasive essay about whether or not teachers should assign homework. I think it will be entertaining to see their arguments. :)

Today my teacher also informed me of what I will be teaching for the rest of practicum. It's nice to know so far in advance, but I feel pretty overwhelmed. Next week and the week after I am going to be teaching one math inquiry lesson as well as science, social studies, and book clubs for the whole 2 weeks. This amounts to me teaching about 3-4 hours out of the day for the next 2 weeks straight, when the most I have taught up until this point is like 45 minutes. My teacher wasn't kidding when she said she was going to "throw me off the deep end."

It's gonna be a party... But I guess it will help me to be that much more prepared for real life. :)
Wish me luck!
❤, Meagan

6th Grade. . . Again?!

As many of you are aware, I started my second and last practicum on Friday! I was nervous because this one is in 6th grade, which is very different from my last one in 1st grade. I absolutely loved the younger grades, and worried that I would not do as well in the upper ones.

One thing I was worried about is that I wouldn't be "cool" to the 6th graders. I know, I know, you don't have to be their friend, just be their teacher... Blah, blah. But it's nice if they actually like you, not just tolerate you because they have to respect authority.

I was also concerned that I wouldn't know how to connect to these students. I feel like my forte is with the younger kids. I've always babysat younger kids, and they have a tendency to just latch onto me right away. I love their unending energy and excitement, and their unconditional love. I was convinced that 6th grade wouldn't be able to match up to that.

On Friday, though, the teacher put some music on, and all of the kids started freaking out and getting excited because it was Imagine Dragons. I LOVE Imagine Dragons! Immediately following this I got several compliments on my nails, and even one on my handwriting. :) Right away I knew that I was going to like it better than I thought.

Today I gave my introductory lesson, and just showed the students a bunch of pictures of me and my friends, and silly things I've done. When I told the students that I liked going to Jazz games and showed them pictures I took at one, one boy jumped up and said "I LOVE the Jazz! Gordon Hayward!" I agreed that Hayward is obviously the best, and then showed them the picture from the Jazz game Friday night where I got to sit right down by the court with my family to watch warmups and got an autograph from and a picture with Hayward! This kid's mouth just dropped and he shouted something along the lines of how awesome that was and that he was jealous. After this I asked if they had any questions, and the same kid asked me what type of music I like. I told him Imagine Dragons, and he was quite excited. He then proceeded to inform me that his name was          (I'm not actually sure if I'm allowed to say his name or not) and that he is "awesome." Self-proclaimed, but it must be true, right? :)

After my little picture show the teacher gave a speech about how the kids need to listen to me, and whatever I assign they have to do, because I am going to be giving them grades on it. The same kid from before jumped up and proclaimed that "She likes Imagine Dragons, the Jazz, and Hayward. I'll do whatever she asks!"

Win. I think I'm going to like it here. :)
❤, Meagan

. . . And I'm a Mormon :)

Life has really taken a turn for the better lately. Let me just tell you why. Yesterday I spent 13 hours on campus between classes, a group project and individual homework. Ridiculous, right? But... I can honestly say that I feel happier and less stressed than I have in weeks. These last few weeks I've sort of been in a funk. I have been so stressed and exhausted, and while I am still exhausted (like always) I have realized that the more productive I am in schoolwork and the rest of my life, and the more I do for others, the happier I am.

Less than 2 short days ago I posted on here about how I am going to start being brave and living my religion more publicly. That very night at ward prayer they announced that Family Home Evening the next day was going to be making Mormon.org profiles. This is something that would normally terrify me. (It still does, that's why it took me so long to make one.) I could have claimed that the 13 hours I spent on campus yesterday wiped me out and I was simply too exhausted to go on, but... In light of my new resolution I decided to just go for it. You can now see where I came from, what I stand for and exactly what I believe publicly, right here!

Happy reading. :)
❤, Meagan

Words to Live By

"Never let your faith be difficult to detect."
- President J. Reuben Clark Jr.

I was reading an article the other day, and this quote really jumped out at me. It made me wonder... Is MY faith difficult to detect? Or can people look at me and know what I stand for? Am I making the right choices to be an accurate example of a follower of Christ?

I know from experience that putting yourself out there and letting people see where you really come from can make you feel super vulnerable. I have never been one to hold up well when my faith is questioned. I have never been entirely comfortable talking to people of another faith and answering questions about my own, whether cynical or not. But I am trying now to step outside of my comfort zone and invite these conversations rather than shy away from them. I realize that it is high time to break out of my shell. I need to let people see me for me, and and a big, albeit scary part of that, is letting them see my faith.

I know that fear will not get me anywhere in this life. This is a revelation I seem to be coming to repeatedly lately.

On this topic, Elder Russel M. Nelson said in the 2011 April conference that "We do not need to let our fears displace our faith. We can combat those fears by strengthening our faith." And I plan to do just that.
I will be brave.
I will be "bold but not overbearing."
I will be an example of the believers! :)

...Wish me luck.
❤, Meagan

Ki-ki-ri-ca?

"In English roosters say "Cock-a-doodle-doo," but in the Czech Republic they say "Ki-ki-ri-ca." Cows say "moo" in America, but in Holland they say "Booo." In the United States turkeys say "Gobble-gobble-gobble," but they say "Holderolderol" in Israel (Conrad, 1995). Roosters, cows, and turkeys really don't say those words, but people in different countries use different words to describe the sounds they hear animals make. Words are summary symbols with meanings agreed on by a society or a group..." (Developing Literacy by Timothy G. Morrison, and Brad Wilcox).

This is what I opened up to and started reading for homework in my Teaching Literacy class in a chapter about vocabulary. I know you are jealous of my homework. Don't even deny it. :)

...But then I went on to read 60 pages of textbook reading and a super long Ensign article. (Since when does it take 45 minutes to read one article??) So on second thought... Don't be too jealous. I've been reading for like 3 hours....

❤, Meagan

I ♥ Snogging? :)

Since I was back in South Jordan today, it was supposed to be laundry day (It did not end up happening.) But...I definitely wore this shirt in public today.

Surprisingly, I didn't get too many funny looks (that I noticed, at least), no creepy offers, and only had to explain what snogging meant once... which was slightly embarrassing. I'm glad I decided a while ago not to give much credence to what other people think of me. Life is more fun that way. :)
❤, Meagan

Everybody's Gonna Love Today, Gonna Love Today, Gonna Love Today!

So it's that time of February again. That day where half the people I know are bitter about their love lives... or lack thereof, and the other half are all lovey and goo-goo eyed. I'm in on secret plots to help other people show love to their significant others, but not getting anything from one myself, haha. It's not my favorite day of the year, but I'm not totally averse to this day either. My mom always sends me something special, and that's sweet. :) I still know that I'm loved.

Guess what?
Today I had a revalation. A year from today I will be in my very own classroom! Forget not having a "valentine". I will have 30! Do you know how much chocolate and candy and cute little cards that is?? I am so excited. I have a feeling this will become one of my favorite holidays. :)

And just a little note for those of you that feel like you are "all alone" on Valentine's day... You are most definitely not. You don't need that one special someone to make this day bearable. Just look around you and realize how many other special people are in your lives. Love is a many splendid thing, but it can come from anywhere, not just a man. I have wonderful family and friends, and they make my life complete. The romance will happen eventually, but until then? I'm still going to enjoy my life.

Also- I found this video earlier. Oh my cuteness! It is the most adorable thing ever. I'm pretty sure my favorite part is when they ask the kids if they have ever been kissed and they all freak out. And the little girl that is going to marry her daddy. Classic. I am so stoked to spend every day of most of the rest of my life with such innocent and special people! :)

On a random note... I searched and I have exactly 239 songs in my iTunes that have the word Love in the title. In case  any of you wanted to know. Awesome. :)

I love you all!

❤, Meagan

Pandora is my Best Friend

I'm pretty sure no one reads my blog, but I like writing in it anyway. I find that I figure my thoughts out better in writing.

That being said... I don't know why I am so obsessed with this song. Pandora enlightened me to the beauty that is now an obsession of a pretty piano part and soft gorgeous singing. I may have listened to it like 10 times in the last 2 days. SO GOOD! I feel like it connects to my life in so many ways. I know it is sort of sad, but it also sounds really hopeful to me. If you don't love it as much as me, then sorry for wasting your time, but I wanted to share. :) 

Maybe I should start a music blog or something. I sure share a lot of songs. 

I hope your days were wonderful. 

Lots of love!

❤, Meagan

The Whole World is Moving and I'm Standing Still

Lately I've been feeling simultaneously like life is going way too fast for me to keep up with, but also like I'm not moving at all. I don't get it. It's confusing, and sort of exhausting.

I may or may not be afflicted by the Senior-at-BYU/slightly-marriage-hungry syndrome. But in my defense, it's sort of hard not to be when people keep asking how you've been at BYU for 4 years and aren't married yet. I blame it on the height. It also doesn't help that every day I log onto facebook I am alerted to either new engagements or pregnancies. I feel like all those that I knew or once dated (especially those I dated) are getting engaged or married and moving on with their lives. So, guys... If you want to get married, date me (interpret that how you will).

I feel like I am barely keeping afloat with school. 17 credits and the impending practicum are really taking their toll on me. Who needs free time? Oh, wait - me. In that case... Sleep is overrated, right? ;) As I've sat here at my little table in the good ol' library, 2 different people have come and sat with me, finished homework, and left. What am I still doing here?? (Other than writing this blog post, because obviously... This is important).

But don't let me fool you... life is not entirely awful. I am done with all of my homework that is due tonight and tomorrow. I have a few things to tackle for Friday, and I am determined to get all of Monday's homework done as well so I can go out of town with some friends and play all weekend. I desperately need a break.

Also- I went to a book sale at Provo library today and bought 20 books for $20! How cool is that?? I am so excited to keep building up my classroom library and help kids to love reading like I do! :)
That's all for now, folks. I need to get back to the books...

Oh, and in case any of you were curious about the title of this post - Give this song a listen. It's a good one. :)
❤, Meagan

A Letter From the Past

I found this cool website last year called FutureMe.org. It is a website where you can write a letter to your future self and pick the date that you want it delivered. I didn't think it would work, but thought it would be a fun thing to try either way, so I wrote myself a letter and set the delivery date for a year from that day. I completely forgot about it until yesterday when I received an email with the following:

The following is an e-mail from the past, composed 11 months and 30 days ago, on January 02, 2012. It is being delivered from the past through FutureMe.org

Dear FutureMe,
I really hope that this new year has been full of happiness and change. Change is not normally something that I would wish on myself, but I've kind of felt like I've been stagnating lately. I hope that I have stretched myself and striven to become better in my weak areas, especially in gaining a stronger testimony. I hope that I have seized every opportunity to step outside my comfort zone and accomplish something amazing. Or even just plain fun. Let's hope this new year is void of regrets and "what if"s. Live and let live!
~ Me
Also - I wouldn't mind a boyfriend at some point. Just sayin'... ;)

I was so amused! I think I will write another one. And this time... since the boyfriend thing came and went already, maybe I will ask myself for a husband. ;)
❤, Meagan